Struggling with Fanaticism

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Justice
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Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Justice »

I'll admit when I first heard of the TOC I thought every synod whether Greek or Russian, was going to be united. Obviously, I was wrong though this never really bothered me. What has unfortunately bothered me is the faults of the clergy, whether these are personal faults or political beliefs that don't conform to Traditional Orthodox teaching.

Even if something doesn't even conform to Donastism, I get nervous. If a priest doesn't insist that women stand on the left and men on the right, red flags go off in my brain telling me that the church doesn't exist because of this minor flaw. I have always struggled with anxiety and maybe my anxiety has evolved into what i'm experiencing now. I can go from being overly zealous to very doubting in seconds and for what? a personal flaw in another human being? a tradition that a person simply forgot toe follow? sometimes I feel like i'm going insane!

I could name other things that I struggle with, but I think it would just make me look more crazy than I sound now. In multiple ways finding out about True Orthodoxy has been a blessing and a curse. A blessing in in that it has resisted all the heresies the World Orthodox have accepted, but a curse in that my anxiety has found another outlet.

Please forgive me a sinner.

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Barbara
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Re: Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Barbara »

You sound highly normal, Justice. Don't worry, Don't fret, Don't let anxieties bother you.
Always it is better to express them and get the feedback of others. That gives balance. ...

No one comes to True Orthodoxy without some upheaval or wondering or thinking deeply. So don't single yourself out
for self-flagellation ! It is the sign of someone studying and learning.

It's good timing that you have spoken during the week before Forgiveness Sunday. We all are getting into this introspective mood. ...

Last edited by Maria on Tue 13 February 2018 3:53 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Edited out two sentences. We are not physicians, and even physicians cannot diagnose online. Best to talk with a priest if concerned about rubrics.
Justice
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Re: Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Justice »

I appreciate your reply. I've been struggling with these thoughts for awhile now and don't wish for them to continue any further. I'm not sure if I sure ask for prayers or try to deal with this on my own.

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Maria
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Re: Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Maria »

Dear Justice,

We all struggle with sin in our lives as none of us are perfect.

Anxiety disorders are more prevalent today because people have neglected to pray unceasingly. Prayer helps to keep us calm, and when we are calm, then we can think more clearly, and can help others too. St. Seraphim of Sarov taught, "Acquire the Holy Spirit, and a thousand around you will be converted."

Pray the Trisagion Prayers throughout the day: Morning, Noon, and Night, and as often as the Holy Spirit guides you.

Glory to Thee, O Lord, Glory to Thee.

O Heavenly King, O Comforter, O Spirit of Truth,
Who art everywhere present, and fillest all things,
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life,
Come and dwell in us, and cleanse us of all impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

+ Holy God, Holy Mighty, Holy Immortal One,
have mercy on us (repeat three times)

+ Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
Both now and ever, and to the ages of ages. Amen.

All Holy Trinity, have mercy on us.
O Lord, blot out our sins.
O Master, pardon our iniquities.
O Holy One, visit and heal our infirmities
for Thy name's sake.

Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy.

+ Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
Both now and ever, and to the ages of ages. Amen.

Our Father, Who art in the Heavens,
Hallowed be Thy name.
Thy Kingdom come.
Thy Will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
And forgive us our debts,
As we forgive our debtors,
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from the Evil One.

Through the prayers of the Holy Father, O Christ our God,
Have mercy on us and save us.

My priest told me to read Christ's Sermon on the Mount as found in Matthew 5, 6, and 7 every day when I was a catechumen. If I skipped a day, I was a wreck. Prayer became my rock, my strength, my source of calmness in the midst of woes.

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?s ... ersion=KJV

Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me a sinner.

Agios_Irineos
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Re: Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Agios_Irineos »

Justice,

The fact that you recognize this struggle is, in itself, a great beginning to overcoming it. Many people obsess over things that they should not, and appoint themselves judge, jury and executioner, and then they find themselves lost and alone in their prideful delusion.

Perfection has never been the standard demanded of the men (and women) who make up the Body of Christ. (We are called to be perfect, as our Father in heaven is perfect, but our human failings cannot harm the Church). There are matters of faith. There are matters of discipline (which are not the faith, but serve to preserve it). There are matters of local tradition and of course matters of Holy Tradition. Orthodoxy is a treasure of many externals which give life to the interior faith -- but are not actually the faith itself! Discerning whether something is a simple human foible or an actual betrayal of the faith can be difficult.

Struggle on my friend. Be fervent in prayer. When your life circumstances permit it, form a relationship with a faithful priest who can guide you and keep you focused on the road to baptism and entry into the Church!

Justice
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Re: Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Justice »

With God's help I'll get over this. For now I will gladly struggle.

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Maria
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Re: Struggling with Fanaticism

Post by Maria »

Justice wrote:

With God's help I'll get over this. For now I will gladly struggle.

Indeed, we either struggle or we give into temptation and sin.

Keep struggling begging Christ's mercy. Those who do so, win the Crown of Eternal Life.

Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me a sinner.

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