AshleyMadison Cheaters' site users made public

[Barbara]

On the Eve of this year's Feast of the Transfiguration,
August 18, 2015,

" Seven years worth of credit card and other payment transaction details are also part of the dump, going back to 2008. The data, which amounts to millions of payment transactions, includes names, street address, email address and amount paid, but not credit card numbers; instead it includes four digits for each transaction that may be the last four digits of the credit card or simply a transaction ID unique to each charge. AshleyMadison.com claimed to have nearly 40 million users at the time of the breach about a month ago, all apparently in the market for clandestine hookups.

“Ashley Madison is the most famous name in infidelity and married dating,” the site asserts on its homepage. “Have an Affair today on Ashley Madison..."

The data released by the hackers includes names, addresses and phone numbers submitted by users of the site, though it’s unclear if members provided legitimate details. A sampling of the data indicates that users likely provided random numbers and addresses, but files containing credit card transactions will yield real names and addresses....

One analysis of email addresses found in the data dump also shows that some 15,000 are .mil. or .gov addresses."

http://www.wired.com/2015/08/happened-h ... ison-data/

Maria, I know there is a thread already on this.
But I felt that this new information should be on the general forums for the edification of visitors to E. Cafe.
I think it's significant that the data was released on the Vigil of the Orthodox Feast of the Transfiguration.

The group or groups which hacked Ashley Madison asserted in their statement that all this promotion is a lie.
In fact 90-95 % of the subscribers are men looking for extramarital affairs, the hackers charge, with a multitude of phony female profiles to lure them.

What does this reveal about the sacred concept of marriage today ?
Many are asking what are the ramifications of this data drop. Perhaps a further erosion of the concept of Marriage in North America is only one of the results.
Going beyond the shock at the gigantic number of signups on the premier "married cheaters' site", the general American public is asking whether there is any online privacy at all on simple business transactions.

Either way, to me this was a great development that evil is being exposed. Maybe the shame will curb some of the infidelity in the future. Let us hope that the public exposure of so many misdoers will create a "crisis of conscience" which will effect a transformation back to traditional pure morals.

[Barbara]

My apology, Maria. I was planning to add posts about the following idea, but felt dizzy from having consumed 1/3 of a 2 ounce bottle of Simplers Ravensara essential oil. I haven't done that for a long time, but it took all day to have the effects wear off.
I had removed the dropper but forgotten that. So when I shook it hard to make a few drops emerge from the little glass bottle, most of the remainder was in my glass in a flash. Not wanting to waste this precious oil, I drank it all. Ooops.

Perhaps you were referring to a salacious passage in that article I posted ? I didn't even notice that, skimmed it right over.
That only returned to memory when I got the Board Warning.

It's not my usual subject, but see if I don't make some valid suggestions here which are unique to the Orthodox approach.

Sorry again. Feeling dizzy is probably the understatement of the year !

[Barbara]

Here is what I was aiming for.
I have thought about this idea for awhile but was not sure whether to post it publicly or not because of the sensitive nature of the subject. For example, if some of our parishioners have run into this crisis, they would feel awful reading about it.
So I didn't post it while thinking how to explain my thoughts.

Now the topic is now being discussed everywhere.

So : why wouldn't our True Orthodox Churches BE READY for the inevitable aggrieved spouses coming to priests or spiritual fathers in monasteries and asking to be tonsured monastics ?

It is not a happy or sure-fire way of finding GOOD monastics to populate our budding monasteries.
But at least it is a constructive way of handling this tough problem which is only now being unveiled. I predict further unraveling as the months go by.

Soon, many people will have been affected one way or another by this.

Rather than coldly turning away the victims of spouses who were being devilish, due to lack of comprehension of their deep troubles, good counsel and consolation will urgently need to be extended to them.
Or, a suggestion to enter monasticism.

Imagine the bitter victims who may complain, "I told Fr so and so about my husband's/wife's infidelity, but he was too busy to listen and said to see a psychologist" - !

They will need warm hearts. Possibly Matushkas could be trained to provide that comfort and spiritual reassurance.

[Barbara]

The healthiest course of action would be for the aggrieved spouses to consider the idea of becoming a novice.
The tougher conditions of life and the usual hard labor often at menial tasks is ACTUALLY THE MOST THERAPEUTIC remedy
in the world for them !

Look at the alternatives. The angry spouse will maybe start some bad habit which could grow into a lifetime addiction.
They would be saved from that.

Or if they choose a better route, the inevitable anger is going to surface in so many unhealthy ways.
Why not let them work it out of their systems at a monastery vegetable garden or other happy and healing environments ?

It's the only way for them to transmute all their bitterness into serving God in a humble way.

[Maria]

The monastic life is a calling from God, as few can handle the rules of the life especially silence, poverty, chastity, and obedience.

Widows and widowers carry the grief of their loved ones, which they often want to share with younger monastics instead of observing silence. This tempts the younger monastics who might leave seeking the married life.

People who divorce are often embittered, and this hatred of their spouse and/or the remembrance of wrongs is not conducive to monasticism.

Older monastics who have been previously married come with baggage that makes it difficult for them and for others around them to be saved.

Sometimes monasteries are specially designed for these separated spouses. Other monasteries receive only virgins who have never been married.

[Barbara]

Very thoughtful, Maria.

Well what about setting up various possibilities like you imply might be the solution to these problems ?

We would be describing sketes, probably, anyway, at this early stage.

That would be more decentralized, allowing for the individual character of each. One skete could be for separated spouses,
another for older monastics, another for younger and middle aged ones. Of course, the timeless principle is that those monastics more experienced in the spiritual life will instruct the newly arrived aspirants. The Catholic position of novice mistress was one of the most important in the entire Convent for this reason, though the title sounds lowly.

Your sentence about older monastics coming with baggage which makes it difficult for those around them to be saved :
to what are you referring here ?? Helps me to understand better. Thanks.

Are the divorced ones more bitter than these possible new entries who would be disillusioned after learning of the
spouse's betrayals ? Some thought needs to be given to that. For there COULD BE a deluge of petitioners in the years to come !

I hope that all the problems could be ironed in advance so as to allow for a smooth transition to the skete/monastic life.

I know you have stressed before that monasticism is a calling. I still see that as an older model which was true in the Middle Ages. Now, because standards of monasteries are much less rigorous, it SEEMS that almost any Orthodox Christian could adapt himself or herself to the rule, if the rule were fairly flexible where reasonable.

Such as making exceptions in the fasting regimen or such for various health conditions, etc.

[Barbara]

PS. It took me a whole 20 hours to bounce back from the Ravensara, which I remembered after I wrote here last night that was also mixed with plenty of Lemon Oil and a number of other oils. That's really a lot to take in ; no wonder i was in a daze !

Now, it seems to me that the silence part would be the toughest for so many chatterboxes. Of course, obedience, too.
If a convert, though, the person would be MORE used to the latter concept which has been familiar for awhile. Whereas laypeople are not told to be silent. So that is why I am envisioning that the demons would be pressing the new pazluzhnik to blab and meet less resistance due to the novelty of this requirement for monastic life.

I am glad you brought that up: I had entirely forgotten about that virtue as being observed in convents and monasteries.